Distaste for the Illogical

Superstars of Dance is a new television show which has captured the attention of millions of viewers (including my family and coworkers). Thrown into a new season of tried and true television shows on NBC, the show is a somewhat Olympic-style competition where 7 countries from six continents showcase their country’s national dances and place them at the merciful judgment of the other countries’ delegates.

Well, that’s ideally how it would work anyway.

As I walked through the cocktail lounge of my workplace, all of my managers and coworkers were glued to the television, watching the Chinese duet performance (the majority of my managers and coworkers happen to be Chinese).

As you can see, it was a fascinating and acrobatic, extraordinarilly graceful, touching frequently on the roots of ballet. I was struck, wondering how it was possible for human beings to DO something that unbelievably difficult.

Afterwards, we heard from the horrible old crone representing Argentina. Instantly condemning them for their lack of movement, dance, or gracefullness (I wondered exactly what she was watching, because it wasn’t the Chinese dancers), she gave them a seven out of ten, much to the chagrin of the booing crowd.

The rest of the judges followed suit, India giving a seven, the rest awarding sevens, maybe an eight if they were feeling generous. The Russian delegate quickly became my favorite judg, commenting that he was slightly envious of what the guy must have been looking at during the dance, followed by an eight.

The Russian dancers were fantastic, performing acrobatic and energetic traditional dances, hearkening the layperson to a cossack-styled celebration. When describing his country’s ethnic dance and traditions, he said;

“Many people think that Russians drink vodka in the morning. This is simply not true, many of us prefer cognac.”

And his country’s dancers certainly looked like they’d be the life of any party, despite angry Argentia lady’s unforgiving seven.

And then it hit me; everything that was wrong with the show just jumped right out in front of me like the South African Gumboot dancers.

The creators of the show were shooting for an Olympic-style competition, where the individual countries were showcasing their dances to the world. The problem? In a fierce nationalistic competition, the countries were judging eachother. What failsafe is in place for when the other countries decide to sabotage another country’s chance at ‘winning the gold’ with a poor rating or low number, despite a flowless and elegant dance performance?

Objectivity is the problem. Granted the individual country delegates aren’t allowed to judge their own country’s dancers, the rest of the judges aren’t at all objective. They can’t be.

So I decided that since the countries represented were from six different continents, we should be searching the neglected remaining continent for a trace of fairness for the show’s benevolence.

That’s right, all the judges should be from Antarctica.

Besides, penguins don’t really dance much.

Trackback URI | Comments RSS